Halloween FOTD

Woooo! I love getting better at makeup.

LEOPARD KICK.

I fucked up my eyelashes this morning, so went around with one of them slightly higher than the other. Oh well. I fixed them now, so all the evening pictures should be sweet.

Question Yourself

This world is full of just so much, that not changing even slightly because of it tells me that you are one isolated motherfucker with no friends. Seriously. If you don't meet people in your day to day comings and goings that don't alter your view on everything you see, you should get new friends.

I am more than aware of how often this occurs -- I'm in nursing. I deal with high risk, low risk, and potentially self-harming behavior. And I encourage everyone to take a deep breath and inch your way into this world that you have not even tapped on the surface of. Scratch the surface! Hell, take your keys and rake your mark into other people's paint jobs.

Leap, jump, and splash into the sea of people and thoughts that surround you, because seriously, you should get your world rocked.

Now I'm not saying that you should change everything about yourself every day of your life because of something new that makes you reevaluate what you previously believed to be your values or something. What I am saying is question your beliefs, and their validity. Question others beliefs and their validity. The Holocaust didn't happen. Veganism is the way to go. Asian girls make superior girlfriends (/coughtrue).

My thoughts:

People will change your view on the world every day of your life.

I believe in God, and one of my best friends is a proclaimed athiest.

My parents are traditional Filipinos who raised me in a Western world. Wooo, that one was a doozy to sort my head through in itself.

I'm in nursing, and have to question my belief system a lot in concern to what I educate people on (ie: abortion, birth control vs. keeping the baby, no contraceptive care) and have to really keep in mind and be considerate of other peoples religions and tolerations. Believe me, the feeling doesn't go both ways. Some patients refuse to be seen by someone of male or female gender, or refuse to communicate to someone not within their culture.

I'm a Playstation girl at heart, but have begun to fall to the dark side of the Xbox 360.

Old people have sex. And like it. Your grandparents didn't magically wish your parents into the world. Deal with it. Youths and adults today are ageist, its insane. What, you think you won't be thinking of sex when you're 80? Oh you'll probably be thinking about your failing heart and your crappy bowel system, but believe me, the sex drive still exists.

Country music can be the shit, or can be shit.

Other people will remember remarks you make about them long after you've forgotten what you've said.

Cross religion dating is an interesting time.

...But understand that not everyone works like this. Actively seeks out the other people in the world, I mean. Some people are introverted, and accepting that they are just not outgoing people is perfectly fine. However, to never meet new people or interact with society is a different thing altogether.

Darwin

You know what I would like to see in my lifetime? A boy named Darwin become the Pope. I don't want to aim too high and see if a girl named Darwin would achieve something of that level because:

a) if you're a girl and named Darwin, that's just cruel
b) I have little faith in the equalization of women for priesthood within the Roman Catholic domain (or at least within the next 100 or so years).

Why would I like to see this?

Because I take more pleasure than I should in ironic or oxymoron-esque scenarios.

Sensored

I'm beginning to think that maybe making this public blog was a bit of a mistake. This blog was made with the intention to have something to actually reference in conversation, because my other blogs are invite only. I was sick of saying, "Oh yeah, and remember when I talked about... oh wait, nevermind."

Thus, See Jackie Run was born.

However, upon looking at this, I'm left sorely unfulfilled. Like any public persona, this is a public face with a superficial layer to uphold because I have a vague idea in mind for the amount (and type) of people that creep other people's blogs. I'm left unfulfilled in the idea that when I blog, I speak my mind freely. In my private one, my thoughts are unleashed with no real censoring. For this public blog, I'm at a loss as I'm severely curbed in my content and language.

This blog is currently only publicized on two places: FF.net and Facebook. Which in itself is a very big database of potential readers, but only if it catches their attention. I've been inactive on FF.net for over a year, and not everyone on FB can stand to read past a few paragraphs on certain blogs. I only installed the counter today, and people have been talking about this blog to me in person for the last month, so it's about a month delayed. Whatever, the records just for kicks more than anything, because my LJ account has gotten into the six digit hits within the last few years.

Not bad for a private account.

I digress.

So while I feel like I'm periodically stomping on my feet, and biting my tongue in reference to the content that I write here, well... actually, yeah. That's my problem. Hmph.

I'll try for a bit with my unedited content. But I'm pretty sure I'm not going to like the end result.

I AM EXCITED:

Pokemon Jokes

/whilst browsing through some group wall posts on Facebook...

R - /reads off a wall post: "I'd like to slowpoke your cloyster."
J - "...That's the dirtiest Pokemon joke I've heard. Actually, I'm pretty sure that's the only dirty Pokemon joke I've heard."

Woman Suffers Orgasm-Related Stroke

It's official: sex can cause strokes (.../cough/ if several risk factors are involved).

But it doesn't seem as eye-opening when you read that last part.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/09/16/health/webmd/main4452137.shtml

Isn't it great to have friends who are nurses and tell you weird things like this?

Redredred.

My mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun;

Coral is far more red than her lips’ red:

If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;

If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.

I have seen roses damask’d red and white,

But no such roses see I in her cheeks;

And in some perfumes is there more delight

Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.

I love to hear her speak, yet well I know

That music hath a far more pleasing sound:

I grant I never saw a goddess go,—

My mistress, when she walks, treads on the ground.

And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare

As any she belied with false compare.

William Shakespeare, Sonnet No. 130

Tread Softly

Had I the heavens’ embroidered cloths,

Enwrought with golden and silver light,

The blue and the dim and the dark cloths,

Of night and light and the half-light,

I would spread the cloths under your feet:

But I, being poor, have only my dreams;

I have spread my dreams under your feet;

Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

W. B. Yeats, He Wishes for the Cloths of Heaven

Buffalo?

Ahh, it all makes sense now.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Wikipedia_Signpost/2007-03-26/WikiWorld

Cindy McCain

I take it back, this woman has some serious cred:

http://www.johnmccain.com/about/cindy.htm

Yooo, Deadwood.

Henri, my entire profile on this thing is a joke if you didn't realize. Would it be more obvious if I wrote that I transform into a hulk-like man by the power of Greyskull for you to realize it? I thought the obvious first sentence saying, "My last name is Chan," was a dead give away (it's actually Benito). And the fact that it says I was in plumbing at the U of A. I'm not even sure the U of A offers education specific to that line of work; maybe to supplement it, but not so much to teach it.

So Sven MSNed me this video today, which I thought was one of the most incredible monologues I've heard in a long time. My inner feminist was screaming bloody murder within the first thirty seconds of him talking, but what an absolutely incredible clip:



On another note:

Man, life is good.

Windows Composition & Poll Results

Music using ONLY sounds from Windows XP and 98!




Results from Poll:

So five of you creepers have decided that out of Crocs, Harry Potter, Uggs, and Miley Cyrus, you'd save Uggs. Which in all actuality, out of all the options, seems the most practical. Because despite me thinking they're ugly as hell, they serve at least a functional purpose in keeping your feet truly warm.

Am I Asian? Hahaha...

1. [x] Your mother has or had a short-haired, curly perm.
2. [ ] Your dad is some sort of engineer.
3. [x] Your parents still tried to get you into places half-price saying you were 12 when you were really 15.
4. [x] You ask your parents help on one math problem; 2 hours later they're still lecturing.
5. [x] You have a 40 lb. bag of rice in your pantry.
6. [ ] You shop at 99 Ranch.
7. [x] Everyone thinks you're "Chinese" no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from.
8. [x] You've had a bowl haircut at one time in your life.
9. [x] Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends' kids.
10. [ ] You've had to sit through karaoke videos with scantily clad, ugly Asian women attempting to dance and walk around a temple, forest, or library.
11. [x] Your parents say, "Don't forget your heritage."
12. [ ] You or your parents drive mostly Japanese cars.
13. [x] You've learned to keep bargaining even if the prices are rock bottom.
14. [x] You've had to eat parts of animals they don't even put in hot dogs.
15. [ ] At least once, you've started a joke with "Confucius say...."
16. [x] You know what bok choy is.
17. [x] You've gotten little red envelopes around February.
18. [x] Piles of shoes tend to make it hard to open the front, back, and closet door.
19. [x] You hear (your name + eee (optional) + yah!) every time someone calls you (e.g. Joy - ee - yah! or Joy - yah!).
20. [ ] You have no eyelashes.
21. [ ] Idiot people try to impress you with pathetic imitation Asian languages, like the ever-so-popular: ching chong woo bok chi, etc?
22. [x] Your parents say leaving rice in your bowl is a sin.
23. [ ] The Bio lectures on marine life (seaweed, sea cucumbers, and octopi) were last night's dinner.
24. [ ] Your ancestors 1000 generations back invented the back scratcher.
26. [x] Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 12 midnight to say, "In Korea (or other native country), we studied even more."
27. [ ] Your parents expect you'll be best friends with any one off the street in any given area as long as they are Asian.
28. [ ] An Asian woman comes on campus and people ask: "Is that your mother?" Well then, "Is it your sister?"
29. [ ] Your relatives' houses smell like incense, mothballs or both.
30. [ ] Your parents say, "Calculus? I took Calculus in 8th grade!"
31. [ ] Everyone thinks you're good at math.
32. [ ] Your parents' vocabulary is filled with "ai-yahs, and Wah's?
33. [x] You like $1.75 movies.
34. [x] You like $1.50 movies even more.
35. [x] Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Asia with fuzzy bunnies, vinyl ducks, and English words that make no sense, in great colors like yellow, pink, magenta, orange, and the ever popular lime green.
36. [ ] Your parents insist/suggest you marry within your race.
37. [ ] You never order chop suey, sweet and sour pork, or any other imitation of oriental food.
38. [ ] You either really, really want to go to UofT or really, really want to stay away from it
39. [ ] Your parents have never kissed you.
40. [ ] Your parents have never kissed each other.
41. [x] You learned about the birds and the bees from someone other than your parents.
42. [ ] "You want a stereo?! When I was your age, I didn't even have shoes!!"
43. [ ] People see a bunch of scribbles on a chopstick and ask you to translate.
44. [x] You have to call just about all your parent's friends "Auntie and Uncle."
45. [x] You have 12+ aunts and uncles.
46. [ ] At expensive restaurants, you order a delicious glass of water for your beverage and NEVER order dessert.
47. [x] Your parents simply cut the green/black part off the bread and say "Eat anyway. It's still good."
48. [x] The vast majority of the people related to you wear glasses.
49. [x] You will most likely be taller than your parents.
50. [ ] Your parents have either made you play the piano, the violin, or both.
51. [ ] You get nothing if you do well in school, but crapped on if you don't.
52. [ ] When going to a friend's house, you always have to bring a gift.
53. [ ] Your dad still pulls his socks up to his knees.
54. [ ] Your family owns a tennis racket, golf clubs, or both.
55. [x] Your family always cheers for the Asian athlete on TV.
56. [ ] The furniture in your house never matches the wallpaper, the carpet, the decorations, or any of the rest of the furniture.
57. [x] rocks, sticks, leaves, and strange-smelling, unknown substances in your pantry for use as medicine.
58. [x] You own a rice cooker or two.
59. [ ] You buy soy sauce by the gallon.
60. [x] Your family owns butcher knives bigger than your head
61. [x] Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrible the weather was in their native country, and how much they still appreciated going.
62. [x] Your mom buys you clothes and shoes many sizes too big so you can "grow into it" and wear it for years to come. ]
63. [x] Your parents believe in feng shui.
64. [x] Your parents are very conservative and think that tank tops/halters/spaghetti straps shows too much skin.
65. [x] Every time your parents lecture you, they always make up excuses that relate to everything you've done in the past.
66. [x] You eat rice everyday almost.
67. [ ] You like JIN.
68. [x] When you were little. Your parents punish you with sticks and stuff
69. [x] The adults fight for the bill when you go out for dinner.

38/69 = 55%.

Wow, I think I'm less Asian than I was five years ago, because I'm pretty sure I've taken this test before and the percentage was wayyyy higher.

Blizzard reveals its new Diablo III/3 logo:

PlanetDiablo shares the improved Diablo 3/III logo due to people's complaints of the lack of colors and darkness. Now, I am a very far cry from a Diablo fan. But this made me LOL hard:

read more | digg story

Michelle Obama

You know, it's shameful that I'm more engaged with the politics south of the border than I am with my own country's - and the Canadian federal election is literally two days away. This website is basically the culmination of my knowledge for that election (http://canadaelection2008.wordpress.com/). I have only superficial perspectives on all the candidates who are running, but considering filial connections at the moment, I won't really mention my personal position.

Back to America 2008:

I've become a really big fan of Michelle Obama in the last little while. Cindy McCain gets the thumbs up from me just because she dresses fucking awesome (sorry, that's about all I have for her), Michelle has a special insight and perspective that she constantly makes as her platform.

I can only imagine her thought process. She mentions the fact she goes down all the "dark roads" before really focussing on the bigger picture. She overthinks -- something I like terribly about this woman. She imagines all the bad, and all the good, that can possibly happen on the road with campaigning for her husband. But what she always manages to bring it back to is looking at the bigger picture.

Every single time anyone tries to bring it back to "how to do feel about being the first black woman..." or anything to deal with the color of her skin, she brings it back to the bigger picture. She'll focus her answer to not think about her being black, but about her being a woman. When the talk centers on her kids and how she deals with the stress, she brings it back to how she's incredible fortunate to have the resources that most working mom's do not have at their disposal. She brings it back to the main issues, and talks about the ideas that stem from them. She allows an awareness and an insight to be spoken aloud by someone who people will listen to. But most importantly, she will not allow her answers to be force her into a corner, something I find to be a very incredible talent.

Larry King asked her what she thought about her possibly becoming the first black woman first lady. She spoke of what an incredible opportunity it would be, and how it would allow her the opportunity for so much. How it would allow her the platform to speak on behalf of so many. And so on and so forth. Her answer had me nodding my head in approval.

She's incredibly aware, something I find that people are slowly becoming more keen to. At first I used to have a very jaded idea on what people are aware with in this day and age. I mean, I was talking to a bunch of 9th graders the other day about September 11th. And their response was sort of this casual brush off of the topic, because they "didn't really know much about it." My jaw literally dropped. I remember the day that this happened when I was in grade 9 myself, and being blown away and thinking about the impact that event had on global policies. I dunno. Maybe a sense of this kind of awareness has to come with age -- I dunno. Regardless, people are learning about their environments now at an incredible rate. People are in tune with the world: Burma, Darfur, Georgia. But then again, some people (like me) don't know shit all what happens within her own home city sometimes.

And if blogspot allowed me to put a caption on that photo, it would say:

"Bitch, I know you talkin' 'bout me!"

STREETFIGHTER IV

STREETFIGHTERRRRRRRRRR~!

I'm stealing bits and peices of youu!

Have you ever noticed when you say something you wouldn't have characteristically said? But you know someone who would have said the same thing? Or not even that, more like, you've altered your speech pattern or verbal intonation to match that of someone you know?

It's called other people rubbing off on you (Henri, this is for you).

I think it's sort of fun actually. When you know that a person is awesome enough that you take away bits and pieces of their personality to add to your own.

...you thief.

Frost 2008

Holy SHIT, I haven't been that hungry in such a long time. At like 2am, my body wanted to collapse from hypoglycemic shock. Or something.

Explanation: I ended up going to Frost 2008 with Armin van Buren at West Edmonton Mall (Ed's Center) last night. Starts off great actually, besides me freezing my ass off in my skirt walking from Danielle's house to the bus stop. The bus driver asks about our "juice" in the Dasani 2L we're lugging around but he didn't raise a fuss as we brought it on the bus.

We get to Ed's at around 9:45ish, and the main floor is full of chalk white. There are two dozen giant harder-than-Styrofoam snowflakes hanging from the rafters, and while walking into the room, a couple Asians pass me giving me the look as if they know me. My hair is a mess of curls covered in silver sparkles that took three hours to fully do (fuck, I never realized just how much hair I really had), and I'm wearing the checkered white-on-white Ben Sherman shirt I got during the fashion show, and a jersey short-skirt.

Oh, and flats. My feet thanked me profusely at the end of the night.

Danced a bit, but the lower main floor was sort of dead. There was this black guy who was dressed in only white tights, and had airbrushed white decals all over his upper body with stars and shit. It was a pretty sweet effect. Another woman was wearing this really cute laced corset, with white gauzy material acting as the skirt and as poofy-princess sleeves. It was quite the outfit -- it made me think of what to possible wear the next time I attended an event like this. Definitely not sticking with generic next time.

David and I chug back a couple raspberry vodkas, and head upstairs. Awesome music. Spun around a lot, danced for a good hour or so. Then I heard my name called, and Angelo is standing next to me. I'm not wearing my glasses, so the only way I recognized him was the shape of his head and his frames (haha, sorry). Oh, and his voice. Oh, and Matt de M. is there, with Tom M.

Then my head started to ache.

A few amaretto-in-coke's (mmm... <3) later, and I'm back to dancing.

We ended up heading back downstairs, but fuck that was like being a sardine trapped in a tin can for a good half hour. Not to mention the cement flooring was sticky as hell, and I kept getting bowled into by the dozens of shifting people. Not enjoyable at all. It was actually the biggest turn off for the night.

We escaped from the mass of white (which took like a million years because it was a two way lane of people trying to get where we came from, or escape to get to the back area). Ran into Matt de M. with Tom again, and chilled there.

By this point, I can actually feel my body begin to regress into a sort of hypoglycemic state. You know that feeling you can get when you've worked out too much without eating? Like, you've run for 20 minutes straight, and then do 100 sit ups but then want to collapse from lightheadedness. And your body becomes lethargic, and sitting upright makes you feel sick? WELL, I had already DONE that in the morning when I worked out. And I still hadn't eaten beyond the yogurt and the toast I scarfed down quickly when I got home that morning. And I was at that point again. I had to physically restrain my body to stop it from shaking, I was so hungry.

Armin comes on around 1:30pm, and I finally run into David P.

Then David H. and I are like, "Fuck it, we're hungry." So we go around to a whole bunch of security guards, and we're like, "Can we buy food around here?" One of them actually laughed and said that's the first time someone has asked around for actual food. Implying they probably got more questions about Vitamin C and its associates than anything else. But I'm very adamant in saying I want a burger. Specifically McDonalds. And hashbrowns.

But security-guy-who-implied-drugs is no help, and then David and I see a giant sign that says, "FOOD SERVICES UPSTAIRS." And I'm like, "ORLY?" Because we were just upstairs and I had seen no food anythings anywhere there. We go and check it out again, just in case, but I was right the first time and there are no food services there. The liars.

We ended up talking to one security guard who was nice enough to get off his post to go to the off-limits area vending machine and get us some food (actually, this guy looked so fucking dead and tired).

So we ditched for Denny's, and it was the smartest decision of my life. I devoured my hashbrowns and Moon Over My Hammy's, and my body receded from pilfering energy from parts of my body not meant to be pilfered from. I haven't felt that absolutely starved in so long, the sick-feeling starved.

It was an early night (strange how peacing out at 3am is considered an early night), but still had a blast nonetheless.

Fuck, ow, neck.

So yesterday, I went with David P. to Ortona because he told me he'd teach me how to do a backflip.

What I failed to mention, and he failed to fully understand, is that I am the least gymnastics oriented person ever. In the world.

Needless to say, my attempts at a handstand would have you laughing your pants off.

I tried to flip in the air, then I fell weirdly and landed on my neck. Fucking ow.

Yep.

I'm pretty sure I whiplashed myself with the landing.

Streetlight

Today, I had the strangest feeling in my stomach. I have been talking on and off about wanting to go back to the Philippines for relief work. But "voluntourism" struck a nasty stigma and chord inside me.

But then I got an email from Brock Paterson, and suddenly everything felt... right.


Hey Nurses,

My name is Brock Paterson. I'm a fifth-year university student and a first-year nursing student in the After-degree program here at the U of A. As a classmate, I'd like to share with you an experience I had this past summer.

Streetlight is the name of a childrens' shelter based in Tacloban, Philippines, which, according to a report by the United Nations, is one of the poorest regions in southeast Asia. I was invited in early 2008 to join six other U of A students in fundraising efforts and a trip down to the shelter for the summer. To be perfectly honest, the trip changed my life.

What was I looking for when I decided to make such a huge decision? I wanted some global travel experience, but I didn't want it to be meaningless. "Voluntourism" struck me as a kind of empty word. Streetlight instead struck the right nerve.

Why so? I'd like to invite you the Streetlight Canada Open Forum to hear the full story. Taking place on October 16th at 6pm in Business1-06, we want to let more students on campus hear about this opportunity to get involved.

And not all of your options will require malaria pills, I promise.

Hope to see you there!
Brock



http://www.streetlightcanada.ca/aboutus.html

Orgasm vs. SUPER Orgasm?!

So NARS released a new version of Orgasm, one of their trademark colors and blushes the other day (it's called Super Orgasm ($25 US)):

It's described as a "shimmery peachy pink with golden flecks of glitter." I... am actually really interested in this one. I have MAC's Danity mineralized blush, which is reminiscent of this color, and I'm not really a fan of buying almost-doubles. Although the quality and material is completely different. I spend a lot of money on make up (even though I really don't need it), but I buy things that generally pop out and scream, "OMG AWESOME."

I either like: bright, bold colors that make people glue their eye-ballers to my face; or really subtle make up that makes it seem you're not wearing any make up at all.

AND, I really like crazy make up. MAC came out with so many sweet face charts for this year! For Halloween, I was all hyped up to do something crazy special fx make up like this:

Or some crazy mutilated flesh one (with all my syringes sticking out of them and everything), but no. Because...

I'm in clinical.

And not only that, I'm in community and maternity/gynecology. Yeah. That won't scare off my clients and their families at all:

"OMG I LOOK LIKE I'M GOING TO EAT YOUR BABY. "

Because this is what I was planning to look like for Halloween:

[Photo inspiration: http://community.livejournal.com/eyeshadowsluts/4992327.html].

Or this:

[Photo inspiration: http://community.livejournal.com/smokin_makeup/1225583.html#cutid1]

But no.

The one thing I completely regret about being a nurse is the fact that I can't dress up to go to work.

>_>

I know it's superficial, and not really relevant at all, but stillllllll. =(


AND NOW, I'm off to study pathophysiology. The subject where I find out about stuff that doesn't go right in your body.

CLINICAL

MY SOCIAL LIFE IS SCREWED ONCE CLINICAL STARTS, OMGZ.

& yes, Chad, I blog a lot.

Nurses /lovelovelove

I found this on the discussion boards of "Ten Reasons Why You Should Date a Nurse" group on facebook.

It's absolutely hilarious. Or at least I think it's hilarious:

Written by a husband of a nurse.......

Ah, such mysterious, wondrous creatures are nurses. What treasures lurk beneath those crisp, white uniforms....What young man doesn't have fantasies of discovering those secrets for himself?

SCREEEEEECH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Reality check! I've been married to a nurse for a quarter of a century, and let me tell you, nurses are not what you expect (and I don't even care what you expect, because you are wrong!). Let's begin by tearing down some of the more famous assumptions about nurses right off the top:

The Nurse as Sex Kitten: Any man who lived through the early seventies or has made it a point to rent such famous videos as "Night Duty Nurses" or "Student Nurses" or "Night Duty Student Nurses" or any one of several dozen nurse-centric skin flicks will immediately believe that all nurses have heaving bosoms, just millimetres away from popping out of skin tight white uniforms. You will also believe that nurses always wear white garters, fish-net hose, and stilettos. This, of course, is a handy dress code because movie nurses spend *a lot* of time hopping in and out of patient's beds.

The reality is that most nurses wear scrubs - shapeless, draping hunks of cotton that could cause you to breeze past Pamela Anderson without a second look. Shoes are white and chunky with blobs of things on them better left unexplored. Socks replace white hose and garters, and when is the last time anyone saw a nursing cap? Graduation, perhaps?

The Nurse as an Angel: If you want to hear the latest gross jokes, just find a nurse (this is so me). Some uninformed males seem to think of nurses as angelic creatures: demure and loving, a cross between a nun and their mom. Well, hate to bust your bubble, guy, but as a group, nurses are some of the rawest folks you'll ever run into. I don't care how sweet and demure they may look on the outside inside is someone who has seen things that would gag a maggot, break your heart, or drive a normal person nuts. So most nurses develop a very wicked sense of humour squarely lodged in the black-to-sick side of the scale.

Also, in case you are looking for angelic sympathy for the little boo-boo you had in the shop, forget it! Let's say as a typical male klutz, you manage to saw your finger off. You go running to your nurse wife who is on the phone with a nurse friend of hers. As she continues to talk to her friend, she gives the stub a good eyeballing, slaps a towel on it, takes out a baggie to put the severed digit in, and tells you to get some ice while she is explaining to her friend that her dummy husband just sawed his finger off. As you stand there bleeding profusely for 15 minutes she calmly finishes her conversation as though nothing is going on until finally she says, "well I guess I better get him to the hospital."She hangs up the phone, looks at you, sighs and calmly says, "let's go." You have just learned an important lesson. On the nurse scale of emergencies, yours is about a minus 9! As my wife has told me, "when you are on a ventilator, with six drips running, your head down and your feet up, then you're sick. Anything less than that isn't worth getting excited over!"

The Nurses Mutual Benefit Network: As a male either dating or married to a nurse, you should realize one important thing. There are nurses everywhere. That, in itself, is no big deal. The fact is, every nurse knows other nurses who know more nurses, so that by the time you are finished, a nurse on the Island Nation of Chuuk who observes you doing something you shouldn't has the immediate capability of getting word to your wife. This system is way more reliable and efficient than the Internet and has existed for a much longer time. Take it for granted that your nurse wife will know about anything you have done, good or bad, before you get home!

Your Social Life with Nurses: Nurses hang out with other nurses and soon you may find that all your friends are married to nurses. The reason this happens is because in situations where nurses mingle with nonmedical folks things can get ugly. For example, you are out to dinner with your nurse wife, another nurse couple, and two civilian couples. The nurses sit and chat, discussing fun things like bleeding bowels, open sores, how much fat was sucked out of some patient, projectile vomiting, traumatic amputations, etc., all over a nice pasta dinner. The nurses carry on talking as the civilian couples turn funny colours, make faces and suppress their gag reflexes (and this is if the nurses don't have any really gross things to share like the homeless guy with maggots in his bleeding sores!) After several dinners and gatherings like this, you will soon find your circle of friends has shrunk significantly.

The key to avoiding this is to do the following: Never go out in mixed groups with more than one nurse. A lone nurse is ok. The trouble starts when you have more than one, and when that happens, keep the regular folks away. Also get used to the idea that some friends and neighbours will take advantage of the fact that your wife is a nurse by calling at all hours of the day and night for advice. This may include male friends "dropping by" to show your sweetie his rash. The best advice I can give is to just deal with it and hope it isn't contagious.

The Health Ramifications of being with a Nurse: Most nurses have been described as having the constitution of horses which isn't true because I've been around horses and they get sick more often. The reason for this is pretty simple. After about 3-5 years on the job, nurses have been exposed to so many bugs that they either end up dead or full of every antibody known to mankind. (If you want the ultimate booster shot, just get a blood transfusion from a nurse who's worked in a hospital for 20 years!) You don't have all these antibodies, though, so when she does come home with mild sniffles, a week later you're flat on your back with the worse case of the flu of your life!! Oh, and if you are the least bit squeamish, don't even think about the bugs she brings home on her clothes. It will mess with your mind as she talks about her resistant TB patient, the patient full of body lice, or the one with poison ivy in his mouth! so don't ask.

Conclusion: Ah such mysterious, wondrous creatures are nurses.

New Layout

Fuck, the uploader totally demolished the quality of my .jpg header, buttt... I really don't care too much. I could be really anal about it and do a direct link to my photobucket account, but that would destroy my bandwidth like Freiza destroying Vegeta. I did try the direct link to tell you the truth, just to try it out, but it fucked up the placement of the actual layout halfway down the page.

Ahh, so I'm still awake because I snoozed at 1800h yesterday and woke up around 22ooh. So. I'm still awake. After rewatching Om Shanti Om, and bastardizing the lyrics for Dhoom Taana, I can now say I can crappily regurgitate the first six or so lines of that song.

Faking knowing other languages is hard. Well, you know, trying to be decent at it. For example, not just fucking making up "ching chong chang" sounds for Chinese.

I'm sort of regretting making it pink, but I was staring at all my breast cancer awareness stuff today so no doubt that had influence in what my layout choice was. I ended up vectoring one of my pictures to make a decent looking silhouette for the top header.

I should be studying for my pathophysiology midterm -- which I will. Tomorrow. Ughhh... clinical is coming up closer and closer. I can't say I'm exactly looking forward to it either. I'm in the Obstetrics/Gynecology section slash community nursing one, which means its the easier of the two clinicals. But, whatever. I'm going to have to to Medical Surgical for the first 6 weeks of Winter 2009, which means I'm not going to regularily be coming to campus for at least 12 weeks. Woah. I think I'm going to miss it.

If you read my other blog, you'd know I was super super interested in taking the accellerated program just to get it over and done with. But man, I won't lie when I say I don't mind going to school. /nerd. Four years, after some consideration, doesn't look too bad.

But then again, I'm more than likely going to school again when those four years are up.

And yesterday, at Chad's House Party, I tasted the best caramel apple crisp I had ever had in my life. It was literally awesome having a party in my life. It was delicious. Mmmm... soooo good.

And since no blog post should be without pictures, here's an artists rendition of a baby coming out of a vagina:



ALSO:

FROST FROST FROST FROST FROST FROST.

Om Shanti Om vs. Japanese J-Drama

You know, minus the Bollywood dancing, Om Shanti Om reminded me of a lot of Japanese J-Drama. They both have the same cheesy elements, and the boys swoon the same way about girls in both genres. The characters seemingly act the same as well.

The language is different, but the body language is same.

English in Bollywood movies is considerably better than the engrish seen in a lot of Japanese/Taiwanese/Korean dramas too, lol.

But still, totally love this movie:


If you haven't seen it, go download it. But make sure you get decent subs.

And one of my two favorite songs from this movie is Dhoom Taana, has been stuck in my head for the last week and a half...

kaise, naino se nain milao sajna
kaise, mein aise na ghabrao sajna
Kaise, aaye na kaise mohe laaj sajna
Choona na dehko mohe aaj sajna

Dhoom taana ta dum ta na na na
Dhoom taana ta dum ta na na na
Dhoom taana dhir na dhir na

Mostly because of SYTYCD, no lie.

NARS ORGASM / Prostate Cancer & Pharmacology

So I'm researching all this medication and pharmacology-esque stuff for prostate cancer right now (attention males with penises and things -- go get yourself checked out. Anyone over 15 should go for yearly testicular cancer exams, for the record. Or, just feel your balls in the shower. You know, whatever works) ...and getting distracted by all the new MAC promotions and the NARS holiday line:

Omg, I want this nail polish:

It's an orgasm in a tiny bottle -- seriously though, the shade of that peach/pink is called orgasm. They're also coming out with these eyeshadow color (Night Life and Silent Life):

...which are fucking gorgeous. I'm not even a NARS fan at all. The consistency of some of its products doesn't mesh well with what I usually look for. But I like the color of these a lot.

Christian Dior came out with a holiday diamond palate, but while I love the product quality for most CD eyeshadows, I'm very rarely drawn to any of its colors. Maybe its the fact that the color of some of the more drab palates wash out the really vibrant colors -- it's a shame. However, I'm dying to get my hands on some of the Yves Saint Laurant Rouge Volumpte line of lipsticks:



The Creamsheens that MAC recently came out with had much to be desired. I thought they would be better -- but they weren't. Mostly to me though. I didn't find many of the colors considerably flattering. Speaking of makeup, I haven't been shopping for any since the Cult of Cherry release a few weeks ago. Time to go update my collection. :)

I'll post a picture of all my MAC one day when I organize them into a new traincase.


(Photo credit to Temptalia)

Daft Hands

Ben Sherman Fashion Show

What a fantabu-fuckingly-awesome day.

Today was an absolute RIOT.

A RIOT I SAY.

I haven't laughed soooo hard in soooo long.

The Highlights:

• Lunch with German man.
  
• The Birthing Process: some friends were randomly going through my text book and the first page they opened was full frontal graphic pictures of a baby coming out of a vagina. I've since flagged the page, and it was the best conversation starter in the world.
  
• Best text of the day: "I am releasing the fudge dragon."
• Meeting Roxanne in the elevator.
• The wave to Roxanne & I at RATT. Good job, Sven.
  
• Happy Birthday, Eric.
• Not having my ID. =(
• Dancing with Tasha.
  
• "You're not fat. You're skinny."
• The Ben Sherman Fashion Show at Color Blind on Whyte Ave: Invite only, bitchesssss. Bought the best white on white checkered shirt I've ever seen.
  
• Sven's Awesome-ly Sexy shirt
• Chilling with Roxanne at her Cafe d'Awesome for two hours. Seriously fun times.
• Getting my status hacked. Fucking again. Jesus, why does it ALWAYS have to be about fucking diarrhea or the mad shits or farting. Boys are so narrow minded. Although, I technically have to blame this one on a girl...
  
• Hacking Sven's status and switching it to say: "Sven has a small penis." REVENGE IS SWEET.
  

What a great fucking day.

Good Riddance (Green Day)

I'm working on three hours of sleep with aching non-butch muscles. My arms ache from free rock climbing (/fail) on Tuesday, then proceeding to sit down for the rest of the day to write a 10 page research paper. Rolling out of bed the next day and proceeding to work out really helped out the pangs of not-awesome.

If I get butch arms from working out, I'm going to fake girl cry. But not really. My arms have seriously gone from skinny puny Asian uselessness to "wow, I can't wrap my one hand around my right bicep anymore."

It doesn't sound impressive, but it really is.

My right arm is getting considerably bigger than my left one. I keep frowning at either one -- maybe through stare therapy, one may expand or the other will shrink. I've decided to try to become increasing ambidexterous. The first task I assigned myself was to use my left hand as much as possible.

Brushing my teeth with my left hand was ridiculous.

But yeah, three hours of sleep. I'm actually buzzing with energy. Raring to go. Sleep is for the weak.

I say that, but I actually love sleep. Won't even lie. Sleep is awesome. But mind over matter, my dearest, and you can run on very little. Sleep, that is.

Today: workout, sit in a psychology class (that's not mine), Jasminder-time, Greg&Matt in CAB, N290, busride, wings @ Suzy Cues.

This is my first truly public blog. I have a lot of my thoughts scattered on the internet, but this place seemed like a nice new corner to shove stuff into.




Thought of the day:
Have the strength to be vulnerable.

Rewind. Pause. Play.

See Jackie run.
See Jackie hop.
See Jackie stop.
See Jackie laugh.
See Jackie blog.